COLLEGE SCAM — Rich college parents all over the nation are outraged by the news that slightly richer celebrities used their marginally higher wealth to bribe and cheat their kids’ way into elite universities more effectively than they did.
“Why did we pay $220,000 buying our kid a six-year private prep school education when families modestly richer than us can game the system?”
High school seniors who did the hard work of memorizing the answers to likely SAT questions spoon-fed to them by $175/hour SAT tutors since they were 14 feel cheated by peers who paid SAT proctors to secretly correct their answer sheets for them.
Said one bumped-out college freshman, “Why did my folks waste all that cash bribing U. Michigan legally with multimillion-dollar “alumni endowments” when my UCLA friends could cheat the system better for a sh*t-ton less?”
Lamented one Santa Monica parent, “With the money those marginally richer Bel Air families spent buying their kids a fake rowing scholarship I could have bribed my daughter through two years of grad school.”